Pulling Rank
by KidKut
Summary: Revised for better reading pleasure. Tried to make something funny. Please humor me and review. Implied Lady Une x Niko & Une x Trowa. ^_^


Author's note and disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing or the characters. Rated PG-13 for adult implied situations. I got this idea the morning after an all niter of drinking Red Stripe Jamaican beer and a 40oz of Mickey's. ['What chicken crap! You blame it on alcohol!' ~Nia] I have a distaste of Lieutenant Niko's idiotic stints in the series. I guess this is a 'could have happened, but not really' behind the scenes, scene during the time Trowa was undercover as an Oz ensign, loved by Colonel Une, despised by Lieutenant Niko. Go fig. I know there's a lot of peeps who hate Lady Une, but she's all not that bad (just a little schitzo; and besides, that's Treize's fault). >_   
/………../ - ( ß thoughts)  
  


Pulling Rank  
By Kidkut  


  
Ensign Barton dutifully made his way towards Colonel Une's office quarters. He received orders to posted guard at her door, relieving Ensign Stephens for a mid shift hour break and to wait for his review and inspection by the Colonel when Stephens returned.   
  
/Good, lax time for calculating and reflection/   
  
This was a perfect chance to go over the collective bits of information about Oz's future takeover plans he acquired and figure out what would be the best plan to weaken them from the inside. Also, review time of each soldier was in session, and he had to prepare (mentally) reactions and answers he would give to the Colonel. Usually, ensigns reported to their specific Lieutenants, but he was 'special'. Une favored him over all because of his performances. Sometimes, even reveling in his piloting talents in front of others, making him 'uncomfortable' receiving such praises, for they drew unnecessary attention to himself. So it was announced that she would review him personally. Most of the pilots envied or were in awe of him and his skill. Only one wished him dead.  
He smiled to himself, remembering how Lieutenant Niko radiated jealousy after hearing such compliments uttered by his beloved Colonel. He didn't particularly care for the Lieutenant all that much. He had a low tolerance for ignorant people; and it was no secret amongst him and the other soldiers that Niko harbored 'feelings' for Lady Une.   
  
And Trowa was about to find out the extent of those 'feelings'.  
  
Approaching Stephens, salutes were exchanged as well as a goofy grin from the relieved guard. Quickly, he leaned into Trowa and in a low, rushed voice whispered." Lieutenant Niko is in there. Seems like something came up and Lady Une is doing an early review of him." Snickering, he slapped Trowa on the shoulder before walking off to the mess hall for some well needed food.   
"Hmphh." Was Barton's reply as he took position near the portal.   
  
Back to the door, ear somewhat behind the crack, he realized in this location he could clearly hear inside the office.   
  
  
  
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"Lieutenant, it is time for your review." Came the crisp remark of a lady. "Prepare for inspection."  
  
"Well?!?"  
  
"What are you waiting for?!!"  
  
"Undo your pants and get on your knees!"   
  
The sound of a whip cracked in the air.  
  
  
/What the…? / Trowa's eyebrows shot up.  
  
  
"Poorly done, Niko."  
  
"Though you are at 'attention'. You will have to make up for such mediocre behavior. "  
  
"Come here so I can put on your collar….."  
  
"Now get on all fours and bark."  
  
  
/I would never have thought…. /Trowa sweatdropped.   
/Out of all of Lady Une's personalities, I fear this one the most./  
  
  
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[Inside Colonel Une's office]  
  
A very embarrassed Niko stood with his head down refusing to look at her; face beet red, sweat dripping down his forehead as Colonel Une leaned against her desk, arms folded. Her eyes were dead serious and unreadable as she watched the monitor. The screen told her volumes of information about her so called 'right hand man'.   
  
/Or should I say left? /   
  
She inwardly snickered as she watched the confiscated video portraying a very aroused Niko on his knees self gratifying himself, gazing lovingly into the crotch of the mock-Une standing in front of him with a leather whip in one hand, the end of the leash in the other. Hair done up in braided rings, wearing thin wired frames, and a gaudy pink-laced merry widow with stockings.   
  
/She looks nothing like me and I would never wear pink. /  
  
Not being able to take anymore of Niko's humiliation nor how the fake Une's flabby thighs jiggled onscreen, she stopped the 'show' and turned her attention to her subordinate. It seems that he harbored feelings for her, which she wished she never found out about. Then again, the tape was viewed accidentally by a fellow soldier who borrowed the wrong movie from the Lieutenant.   
  
/As long as he does this on his own time, not defecting his military performance…/   
  
Colonel Une sighed and rubbed her temple to stop an oncoming headache, "Pull yourself together Lieutenant and regain your composure. You're dismissed for now."   
She paused as he let out a ragged breath. "Please return to your quarters until I send for you. We cannot tolerate these sort of rogue activities; but I would hate to lose you, being that you are one of my most loyal and outstanding soldiers. Think about how to shape up your performance by the time I call for you again, for reformation is in order. Discipline being the key idea here."  
  
/Treize, if this is the extent of our soldiers, I don't know how Oz will attain anything. /  
  
On a brighter note, her review of Trowa Barton was next, and he so far proved to be the perfect soldier. His performances and conduct never ceased to amaze her, for she saw in him, the ideal future. Une cleared her throat. "Ensign Barton should be waiting outside. Please send him in on your way out."  
  
Obediently, Lieutenant Niko saluted the Colonel before turning and walked out the door in a somewhat hurried pace. Moments later, Trowa appeared, looking impeccable, with the exception of his brows being scrunched as if he was fighting over some kind of internal conflict. Nothing was left unnoticed by Colonel Une's inspection.   
  
"Welcome ensign Barton. It's time for your review."  
  
Trowa just stood there, eyes downcast, slightly trembling, and Une wondered what was wrong with him. /Was he sick?/  
  
"Ensign Trowa Barton, there's no need to be nervous. I find your demeanor to be quite charming, but there is no need to be timid. This is standard Oz procedure. Every soldier goes through this, just be grateful it's with me and not your would be supervisor Lieutenant Niko."  
  
Une was caught off guard by his visible shakiness, but she became even more surprised when he suddenly jerked his head up, lower lip being bitten nervously as he looked franticly in her eyes. She felt pity for him and his nervousness and decided to compliment him.  
  
"Rest assure, I have taken notice during your training and am already pleased with your physical aspects. Such endurance and stamina only proves that you will be a success. This will not be as painful as you think."  
  
And Lady Une became wide-eye and speechless as she watched Trowa bow his head again and dropped to his knees in front of her; undoing his belt and pants in silence.  
  
  
  
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~Love it? Hate it? Flame it? Please review~  
  
ps~ Not one swear word!! Yay!!  
  



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